“If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily,and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will save it. For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and is himself destroyed or lost? " - Jesus (Luke 9: 23-25 NKJV)
In my walk, I have found that when I feel farther away from God, it's because I'm seeking my own way. I try to control my life and then wonder why it feels empty. Then I realize that I'm choosing my life, my comfort, my stuff, my worries, over God. He gave us something so powerful, the power of choice. We can choose to pursue Him or we can choose to pursue ourselves. We can choose to pursue Heaven or choose to pursue our own heaven on Earth. We can choose to control our own life or we can choose to let it go and give it to God. Giving up our lives and placing it in God's hands should be a no-brainer because as David says:
"An
entire lifetime is just a moment to You, human existence is but a
breath. We are merely moving shadows and all our busy rushing ends in
nothing." (Psalm 39:5-6)
So what exactly are we holding on to and why is it so hard sometimes to let go?
Trip Preparation, Part 1
This past week has been very busy as I finally begin to prepare, in earnest, for my trip in January. It feels like I've added another part time job to the mix. I had to get a new passport. My last one got a little beat up after 8 months traveling through South and Central America and last time I came from out of the country, the customs guy said I had to get a new one before I travel again. The normal processing time for a passport is 4-6 weeks. I went to the City of MLT to apply for a new passport on December 1st, exactly 6 weeks from then is January 12th, the day I leave. So lets hope and pray my application is processed fast!
I have also finished writing, printing,and folding my prayer/support letters and am in the process of sending them out. It's hard and awkward for me sometimes to send those letters out because frankly, I'm afraid of what some people will think. Pray for me, that I will let God take control and stop concerning myself with selfish things. The main purpose of the letter and my blog updates is to let people be a part of what God will do. It is amazing to know that I have a team of friends supporting me through prayer, that truly care, and are reading the updates. That means way more to me than financial support. I know the Lord will provide me with enough each day.
“Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For after all these things the Gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble" (Matthew 6:31-34).
If you do give, do so with joy! Paul reminds us in his letter to the Corinthians:
"So let each one give as he purposes in his heart, not grudgingly or of necessity; for God loves a cheerful giver" (2 Corinthians 9:7).
Thank you all for your love and support!
I have also finished writing, printing,and folding my prayer/support letters and am in the process of sending them out. It's hard and awkward for me sometimes to send those letters out because frankly, I'm afraid of what some people will think. Pray for me, that I will let God take control and stop concerning myself with selfish things. The main purpose of the letter and my blog updates is to let people be a part of what God will do. It is amazing to know that I have a team of friends supporting me through prayer, that truly care, and are reading the updates. That means way more to me than financial support. I know the Lord will provide me with enough each day.
“Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For after all these things the Gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble" (Matthew 6:31-34).
If you do give, do so with joy! Paul reminds us in his letter to the Corinthians:
"So let each one give as he purposes in his heart, not grudgingly or of necessity; for God loves a cheerful giver" (2 Corinthians 9:7).
Thank you all for your love and support!
Upcoming Trip to Guatemala
This January, I will be heading to the
Guatemalan highlands for three months.
In the 1980s, the people there were caught in the middle of a terrible
civil war. Both the Army and Guerillas
turned against them and they are still recovering to get back on their feet to
this day. These villagers live in
poverty, sustaining themselves mostly on corn.
Education is a huge need, with the majority of the people unable to read
or write. There are several non- profit
organizations on the ground in this region all doing tremendous things. I will go down representing WIND of God
Ministries. WIND is an acronym for When
It Needs Doing. The organization began
in early 2007 when on a vision trip, the four founders (including my parents)
visited with Mike and Sharon Harvey of ASELSI at their training center in
Chichicastenango. Sharon told them of a
vision of God’s mighty “wind” blowing through the region, breaking down the
strongholds of despair and pouring forth His love and His Word into the hearts
of the people. Since WIND of God Ministries has been established, a little Bible institute near to closing its doors has seen an explosion in enrollment. Qualified teachers are being put in place, and God’s Word is being taught to pastors and lay people alike. My dad gives some perspective after watching a student graduate from the Bible program:
“Jacinto Perez has been the pastor of the Methodist Church for six years. He is a married man with six children. Every Sunday and Wednesday, in front of 50 – 60 of his flock, he preaches a sermon at his church. He is a man of very little education whose only requirement for acceptance into the program at Jorai was the ability to read (some) and write (some). His education the last three years at Jorai is the only formal education he has ever had. The degree he received, the Diplomado, is the equivalent to a sixth grade education. The Diplomado program offers very basic fill-in-the-blank Bible teaching. It is provided to pastors and individuals in the church who wish to obtain a greater understanding of the Bible. It does not offer any deep theological training. For Jacinto, the past three years has opened his eyes to the Bible which he has been teaching. By any standards of man, he is under prepared to lead his growing congregation. He remains hungry to learn more, but his economic situation does not make this possible. Through WIND, he was able to get some initial training and has a strong desire to continue if finances make it possible in the future. He sends his deepest appreciation to all the WIND supporters, and as he looked at us with emotion of the day written on his face he said, ‘You are an answer to my prayers.’”
WIND of God is in need of support to continue its role in providing education to church leaders like Jacinto as well as responding to other needs in this community. While I’m there I will get to know pastors in the program and record their stories. I will look to volunteer at a Christian school in the area. I will provide a liaison and a face for WIND of God in the community while raising awareness of the needs to supporters in the United States and around the world. Most importantly, I will go down with the heart of a servant and see where God leads me. Please pray for Sharon Harvey’s vision to come to pass, that His love would continue to break the bonds of despair. Pray for me, that I would be God led and not lean on my own understanding. I understand that dollars are tight in this troubled economy; if you wish to support me financially please know that any gift, however small, is greatly appreciated and helpful. WIND of God Ministries is a 501c3 non-profit, and all donations made are tax deductible. If you wish to donate please send a check, made payable to WIND, to the address below and attach a note indicating it is for my support (please do not put my name on the check). Three months of living and travel expenses in Guatemala will cost around $2000.
You can learn more by visiting http://windofgodministries.blogspot.com or http://www.windofgod.org
WIND of God
259 Coyote Lane
Lopez Island, WA 98261
All for His Glory,
Jordan
When You Feel that God Cannot Use You...
Here is a bit of encouragement from Action International founder Doug
Nichols:
"When you feel God cannot use you, it is helpful to remember that Noah was a drunk, Abraham was too old, Isaac was a day dreamer, Jacob was a liar, Leah was ugly, Joseph was spoiled, Moses had a stuttering problem, Gideon was afraid, Sampson had long hair and was a womanizer, Rahab was a prostitute, Jeremiah and Timothy were too young, David had an affair and was a murderer, Elijah was suicidal, Jonah ran from God, Naomi was a widow, Job went bankrupt, Peter denied Christ, the disciples slept through prayer, Martha worried over everything, the Samaritan woman was divorced more than once, Zacchaeus was too small, Paul was too religious, Timothy had a stomach problem, and Lazarus was dead.”
"But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to shame the things which are strong, and the base things of the world and the despised God has chosen, the things that are not, so that He may nullify the things that are, so that no man may boast before God” (1 Corinthians 1:27-29, nasb).
"When you feel God cannot use you, it is helpful to remember that Noah was a drunk, Abraham was too old, Isaac was a day dreamer, Jacob was a liar, Leah was ugly, Joseph was spoiled, Moses had a stuttering problem, Gideon was afraid, Sampson had long hair and was a womanizer, Rahab was a prostitute, Jeremiah and Timothy were too young, David had an affair and was a murderer, Elijah was suicidal, Jonah ran from God, Naomi was a widow, Job went bankrupt, Peter denied Christ, the disciples slept through prayer, Martha worried over everything, the Samaritan woman was divorced more than once, Zacchaeus was too small, Paul was too religious, Timothy had a stomach problem, and Lazarus was dead.”
"But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to shame the things which are strong, and the base things of the world and the despised God has chosen, the things that are not, so that He may nullify the things that are, so that no man may boast before God” (1 Corinthians 1:27-29, nasb).
Walking the Path You Can't See
Behind my apartment, there is a tiny trail that shoots up a hill. From there is a trail system that almost nobody knows about, unless you happen to live close by. I have had many walks on those trails but some of my best walks happen at night. As I go up the hill, the darkness envelops me until I can't see anything. I walk the trails without being able to see where I'm walking, just trusting I'm still on the path. I start out walking very slow. I am unsure of the path and don't want to take a wrong step.
As my eyes adjust to the darkness and my feet find good footing, I begin to see the path. It is not clear like in the day, but I see enough that I begin to walk with confidence. I can make out the tree branches where I need to duck, the roots that could trip me up, or the fallen tree that I need to step over. On these walks God teaches me about the eyes of faith. "For we walk by faith, not by sight." (2 Corinthians 5:7)
At first you stumble around in the darkness and you are unsure of every step. But with practice and action, the trail becomes more clear and the journey is breathtaking. You are confident because God is with you, you know He is by your side. You feel His presence so clearly. But you have to start walking first. Those first few steps of faith will be like walking a narrow path in pitch black. But as you take each step of faith, your spiritual eyes will adjust and you will begin to see the path that God has prepared for you.
As my eyes adjust to the darkness and my feet find good footing, I begin to see the path. It is not clear like in the day, but I see enough that I begin to walk with confidence. I can make out the tree branches where I need to duck, the roots that could trip me up, or the fallen tree that I need to step over. On these walks God teaches me about the eyes of faith. "For we walk by faith, not by sight." (2 Corinthians 5:7)
At first you stumble around in the darkness and you are unsure of every step. But with practice and action, the trail becomes more clear and the journey is breathtaking. You are confident because God is with you, you know He is by your side. You feel His presence so clearly. But you have to start walking first. Those first few steps of faith will be like walking a narrow path in pitch black. But as you take each step of faith, your spiritual eyes will adjust and you will begin to see the path that God has prepared for you.
Thoughts from a Graveyard
Sometimes, to clear my head, I wander somewhere in the outdoors. One day a while back, I was wandering through a graveyard close to where I live. I had been studying the book of Ecclesiastes at the time and it played heavily in my thinking as I sat down and began writing:
"Love knows not its depth until the hour of separation" - A random gravestone in a graveyard
The older gravestones have no flowers. A generation passes and these people are forgotten by the world. There is nobody left to remember them or how they lived. Everybody they had known in their life are now gone with them. Vanity. Our time here is only borrowed. We are here for a short time and then we die. Everybody I'll ever come in contact with will die with me. Whatever difference I make in their lives, they will still die like the rest.
We can't handle that. Something in our souls pine for eternity. Death in this world is a certainty. But what of our souls? Every face is different. Every personality. The Lord meant something specific when He made each of us. Our souls long for freedom but we are trapped in these decaying bodies. Jesus overcame death and raised others from the dead! While many things have been forgotten by the world, this has not. His resurrection sparked a revolution that continues 2000 years / 25 lifetimes later!
"Love knows not its depth until the hour of separation" - A random gravestone in a graveyard
The older gravestones have no flowers. A generation passes and these people are forgotten by the world. There is nobody left to remember them or how they lived. Everybody they had known in their life are now gone with them. Vanity. Our time here is only borrowed. We are here for a short time and then we die. Everybody I'll ever come in contact with will die with me. Whatever difference I make in their lives, they will still die like the rest.
We can't handle that. Something in our souls pine for eternity. Death in this world is a certainty. But what of our souls? Every face is different. Every personality. The Lord meant something specific when He made each of us. Our souls long for freedom but we are trapped in these decaying bodies. Jesus overcame death and raised others from the dead! While many things have been forgotten by the world, this has not. His resurrection sparked a revolution that continues 2000 years / 25 lifetimes later!
Back Log
It has been over five months since I've written here. But I have been writing plenty in my journals. I will share some things from there for a few weeks to get me back in the habit of updating this blog. Sometimes, there is so much I want to share that it feels overwhelming and then I don't share anything at all! But I will start small and humbly with this little post and we will see where this blogging goes from here. ;)
I am leaving for Guatemala on January 12th. Look for information on that too!
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